#33 I hope it's not Senility

I had my follow up appointment with Dr. Straight-Laced today. And although I like him, he left me wondering if my decision to switch was truly a good idea or not.

We started the appointment off with "So why did you quit taking the Cyclosporine?"  My eyes bugged out. "Ummmm, because you told me to." 

Now, I know damned well that he DID tell me to taper off the Cyclo and Pred and to quit taking both at the beginning of September. I distinctly remember him telling me in July that 1) Since I've been on Cyclo for one year, my body will need a break from the meds, and 2) The break will give us an opportunity to find out how my body will respond to no medication, and 3) I might have to be hospitalized due to withdrawal, and 4) The cyst I have on my right rear flank might go down with the cessation of the Cyclo, but that if it didn't, we'd have to see about having it biopsied.

I also have a witness. Terry goes to every appointment with me. I held my breath and counted to ten before giving him an eat shit and die look. After scrolling through my labs he began to come round to my side of thinking. He said, "At least we know how your body is going to respond to tapering, because you have jumped up to above 3,000 per 24/hr.

I didn't want to hear that. Not good. Not good at all. I've completely relapsed.  I already knew I had because my body is starting to swell. My toes are fat. My knees are puffy. My eyes are leaky. I can smell a change in my urine as well as see the foamy texture to it. But anyone who has this disease or any disease for that matter, prays for that cure. Prays for a reprieve. Prays for a miracle. Even me.

The whole visit sucked. My blood pressure and protein were up. My hemoglobin was down. The only good news I got.....my cholesterol was back to normal. Well who the hell cares about cholesterol when your kidneys are failing? 

At any rate, I certainly hope his failiing memory is just a bad day and not senility or something. I'll hold out judgment til the next appointment.